Friday, December 23, 2011

Mon oncle Antoine (1971)

“What am I doing here, Benoit? I'm not happy. I'm not made for the country. I hate it here. I wanted to buy a hotel in the States. Your aunt wouldn't let me. She says no to everything. I'm afraid of corpses. I've been afraid of corpses for 30 years! I work for everybody. Your aunt never gave me a child. I have to take care of other peoples' children. I raise Carmen and you. Haven't I done all I could for you?”

The Story:

On a 1940s Christmas Eve in wintry Quebec, young Benoit (Jacques Gagnon) unexpectedly begins an odyssey of self-discovery at his uncle Antoine’s (Jean Duceppe) general store. Little does he know that he’ll end up in the remote house of the Poulin clan, whose patriarch has just set off on his own journey. Both paths inadvertently intersect when tragedy befalls the home, leading to Benoit’s epiphany about the nature of both life and death.

Monday, November 28, 2011

Honorary Graduate - David Wooderson

Character Profile - David Wooderson

  • APPEARED IN: Dazed and Confused (1993)
  • ACTOR: Matthew McConaughey
  • QUOTE: "That's what I love about these high school girls, man. I get older, they stay the same age."
  • NICKNAME: Woodabeen
  • FAVORITE ALBUM: Tooth, Fang, and Claw – Ted Nugent and the Amboy Dukes
  • INTERESTS: Redheads, freshmen girls, working for the city, keeping a little change in his pocket, not listening to dipshits, foosball, joints, pool, L-I-V-I-N.
  • ACCOMPLISHMENTS: Played football at Lee High School, considered going to junior college
  • Thursday, November 17, 2011

    West Side Story (1961)

    "Juvenile delinquency is purely a social disease.”
    “Hey, I got a social disease!”

    The Story:

    In 1950s Manhattan, a couple of street gangs are perpetually at war; one is the Jets, a white gang led by Riff Lorton (Russ Tamblyn). The other is the Sharks, a group of Puerto Rican immigrants (dubbed “PRs”), who are headed by Bernardo Nunez (George Chakiris). At a dance attended by both gangs, Tony (Richard Beymer), a former Jet, shows up as insurance against an impending scrap; instead of finding a fight, however, he eyes Maria (Natalie Wood), who happens to be Bernardo’s sister. The two instantly fall in love and meet with disapproval from their fellow gang members. Their romance is also met with tragedy, as tensions between the warring faction come to a head at a violent, deadly rumble. 

    Friday, November 4, 2011

    A Very Harold and Kumar Christmas (2011)

    "I shot Santa Claus in the face--he's real, and I shot him in the face!"

    The Story:

    It’s been years since Harold (John Cho) and Kumar (Kal Penn) escaped Guantanamo Bay and hooked up with the girls of their dreams in Amsterdam. They’ve since grown apart, as Harold finally moved out of their dingy apartment to become a happily-married and successful banker who has given up weed. Meanwhile, Kumar has literally burned out of the medical practice and is spending his Christmas perpetually blazed and watching A Christmas Story. They’ve even each got new friends; in fact, they haven’t even seen each other in two years. However, the two are reunited when a mysterious package arrives at Kumar’s door; it takes the hapless stoner about two minutes to burn down the prize Christmas tree that Maria’s father (Danny Trejo) brought home for the holidays, so the duo are forced to set out on yet another epic journey to find a replacement.

    Thursday, November 3, 2011

    Harold & Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay (2008)

    "Why does everything has to be a huge argument with you, man?”
    "Because this is America, dude, and as long as I have my freedom of speech, no one's going to shut me up!"

    The Story:

    Fresh off of downing more White Castle than is fit for human consumption, Harold (John Cho) and Kumar (Kal Penn) head off to Amsterdam to track down the former’s beloved Maria (Paula Garces, aka that hot girl in the elevator from the first movie). At the airport, the two bump into Vanessa (Danneel Harris), an old flame of Kumar’s who is now engaged to Colton (Eric Graham). Though Kumar is somewhat shaken by this news, the allure of all that weed in Amsterdam gets him on the plane anyway. Because they’re minorities, the two are suspected to be terrorists by an old lady on the plane; they don’t help their case when Kumar sneaks a “smokeless bong” onto the plane, which is mistaken for a bomb. The two are swiftly apprehended and tossed into Guantanamo Bay; though their stay is short-lived, they must embark on a cross-country journey to clear their names and win back the love of Kumar’s life.

    Wednesday, November 2, 2011

    Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle (2004)

    "Did Doogie Houser just steal my car?”

    The Story:

    Harold Lee (John Cho) and Kumar Patel (Kal Penn) are a couple of stoner buddies looking to get their weekend started off right. That entails multiple bong hits and zoning out in front of the TV. When they’re both seized by an attack of the munchies, they realize only one destination will satisfy them: White Castle. So begins an outrageous evening that sees our duo battling weed shortages, extreme bullies, corrupt cops, and more…all in the pursuit of perfect burgers!

    Saturday, October 15, 2011

    Footloose (2011)

    "This is our time.”

    The Story:

    After the death of his mother, Boston native Ren McCormick (Kenny Wormald) moves down south to Bomont, Gerogia to live with his aunt and uncle. The culture shock is jarring enough, but it’s made even more so by the town’s ultra-conservative laws, which feature a ban on loud music, a mandatory curfew for teenagers, and an ordinance against dancing. These laws were put into place three years beforehand at the behest of the evangelical town preacher (Dennis Quaid), who finds himself personally at odds with Ren when the newcomer courts his daughter (Julianne Hough).

    Wednesday, October 12, 2011

    Footloose (1984)

    "I tell you what I'd like to do - I'd like to fold a Playboy centrefold into every one of Reverend Shaw's hymnbooks!”

    The Story:

    Due to an accident five years ago, an evangelical preacher (John Lithgow) has convinced the town of Beaumont to ban dancing and rock music, the twin tools that the devil uses to cause fornication. New kid in town Ren McCormick (Kevin Bacon) is aghast, and, with the assistance of his new best friend (Christopher Penn) and the preacher’s daughter (Lori Singer), decides to rebel and show the town the benefits of cutting loose and getting footloose (the theme song is now stuck in your head--you‘re welcome).

    Wednesday, October 5, 2011

    Van Wilder (2002)

    "All you need is scented candles, massage oil, and Barry White. Write that down. Look at me. No cock pump.”
    “No cock pump. Barry White.”

    The Story:

    Van Wilder (Ryan Reynolds) is gearing up for his seventh spring semester at Coolidge College, and he’s in search of a new personal assistance. After interviewing many not-so-fine candidates, he eventually settles on Taj (Kal Penn), an Indian foreign exchange student who has come to Coolidge to learn the art of muff-diving. As the semester wears on, the two have to concoct a scheme to pay for Van’s tuition after his dad (Tim Matheson) cuts him off. They also develop a rivalry with a fraternity whose leader (Daniel Cosgrove) has it out for Van after the party animal catches his girlfriend’s (Tara Reid) attention. She’s a campus reporter charged with the task of figuring out who Van Wilder really is…that is, if he can figure it out himself!

    Sunday, September 25, 2011

    Heathers (1989)

    “Dear Diary, my teen-angst bullshit now has a body count.”

    The Story:

    Veronica Sawyer (Winona Ryder) belongs to a clique of “Heathers”: there’s Heather Chandler (Kim Walker), Heather Duke (Shannen Doherty) and Heather McNamara (Lisanne Falk). These three holy terrors dominate the school’s social scene with an iron fist; as Veronica watches their reign of terror unfold, she begins to realize she was much happier before she was popular. Coincidentally, a rebellious new student, Jason Dean (Christian Slater), shows up and similarly sees through all of the bullshit and befriends Veronica. The two plot revenge on the Heathers, and while Veronica just wants to pull innocent pranks, J.D. has much more malicious and deadly intentions.

    Monday, September 12, 2011

    The Bikini Carwash Company (1992)

    “I need something to cover my boobs.”
    “I’ll cover your boobs!”

    The Story:

    The story? Oh yeah, the story! Thankfully allergies don’t run in the family, because when ol’ Uncle Elmer (Patrick M. Wright) is hit hard by the sneezing bug and has to take leave for a summer’s hospital stay, he calls up his nephew Jack (Joe Dusic) to run his company in his absence. The Sunshine Carwash isn’t raking in the dough, but it’s not fledgling either, keeping their established clientele happy. Elmer gets a big bomb dropped on him when he learns that his medical insurance won’t cover this ailment and requests that Jack picks up business – fast! Luckily for both of them that a troupe of bikini girls on summer break from college is in need of funds for a vacation and the brainiest of the bunch, Melissa (Kristi Ducati), gets the wettest idea California has ever seen!

    Sunday, September 4, 2011

    Toga Party (1977)

    "Must have been a bumper crop--that's biggest cucumber I ever did see for a white boy!"

    The Story:

    Purvis (Luther Whaney) is a small town boy with big dreams to follow in the footsteps of Robert E. Lee, Jefferson Davis, and Johnny Cash (apparently in that order). One day, he decides to ditch country life and move to the big city of New York to become a star singer/song-writer. To accomplish this goal, he’ll have to combat pimps, horny cougars, a sleazy manager (Cindy Tree) a crooked promoter (Bobby Astyr), and more as he ascends to the top of showbiz world.

    Monday, August 29, 2011

    Where the Boys Are '84 (1984)

    "Fort Lauderdale is a zoo. It's full of millions of guys who are just lookin' for animal sex and debauchery."
    "Exactly--that's why we're going!”

    The Story:

    Four curvaceous co-eds are beset with the great college quandary as spring break approaches: do they hit the slopes or head for the beach? It’s looking like a beach party tonight as the gals head down to sunny Fort Lauderdale, which has been seized by a throng of college students who have turned it into wasteland of alcohol fuelled debauchery. Some have arrived in search of love, some simply to get laid, but all hope to have the wildest week of their lives.

    Monday, August 22, 2011

    Ski School (1990)

    “What the hell is this mountain coming to? Half naked girls walking around at 9:30 in the morning? Last year they were completely naked by 9:30 in the morning!”

    The Story:

    When John (Tom Bresnahan) enrols in Ski School, a competition ran and almost always won by wunderkind lowlife Reid Janssens (Mark Thomas Miller), he’s given the team of section 8, a carefree bunch of party animals and losers whom aren’t part of any official team’s entry. Running afoul of Reid quickly due to his natural talent, John is the best skier and the biggest womanizer in the section, managing to bed a sweet little blonde he may or may not have feelings for and a new face on the mountain; a leggy, tanned babe with huge cans. After being disqualified from the events due to their unprofessional behavior, the crazy 8 decide to crash the championship in a bevy of beer, babes and balloons. When the audience chants, “let them ski!”, Reid and his investors have a decision to make. Piss off the people, or settle this once and for all.

    Thursday, August 11, 2011

    Your Highness (2011)

    “Just say we are too late, and Leezar was able to...get her cookies. Would you still want her?”
    "I don't want to think about that."
    "Yes, I know...but what if he buttfucked her?"

    The Story:

    After being accused of sleeping with a dwarf king’s wife, degenerate Prince Thadeous (Danny McBride) must use his wits and luck (mostly luck) to escape and return home to his kingdom. Upon arriving there, he learns that his brother, the more admirable Fabious (James Franco), is also returning from a heroic quest. Fabious not only triumphantly carries the head of a cyclops, but also a beautiful young bride (Zooey Deschanel). However, the wedding festivities are interrupted by the evil wizard Leezar (Justin Theroux), who kidnaps her with the intentions of raping her to fulfill an ancient prophecy that will give birth to a dragon. With a legion of knights in tow, the two brothers set out on a quest to save the young princess--that is, if Thadeous can get his shit together, of course.

    Monday, August 8, 2011

    Paul (2011)

    "Are you gonna probe us?"
     "Why does everyone always assume that? What am I doing? Am I harvesting farts? How much can I learn from an ass?"

    The Story:

    Graeme Willy (Simon Pegg) and Clive Gollings (Nick Frost) are a couple of British geeks who are making the nerdiest pilgrimage of them all: the annual San Diego Comic-Con. This just serves as a mere undercard to their main event, however, as they engage on a barnstorming tour of the southwest, hitting notorious hotspots for UFO sightings and alleged alien activity. They end up having a very close encounter of the raucous kind when they stumble upon Paul (voiced by Seth Rogen), an alien life form who is on the lamb, having escaped from the government agents that have kept him captive for over 30 years. Along the way, they pick up a sheltered religious zealot, Ruth, (Kristen Wiig) as they attempt to elude various authorities.

    Friday, August 5, 2011

    The Change-Up (2011)

    "You wished for my life when we were pissing in that fountain!"

    The Story:

    The latest victims of the standard Hollywood body switcheroo plot are Jason Bateman and Ryan Reynolds. Dave (Bateman) is a workaholic lawyer with a wife and three kids (two of which are newborn kids with a penchant for literally crapping in his face); meanwhile, Mitch (Reynolds) is an aspiring (read: unemployed) actor with little responsibilities and even less tact. After a night of drinking, the two piss into a public fountain and jokingly wish they could see how the other half lives; they must have crossed the streams because their wish comes true when they wake up in each other’s body and proceed to wreck each other’s lives.

    Wednesday, August 3, 2011

    Animal House (1978)

    "Is this really what you're gonna do for the rest of your life?”
    "What do you mean?"
    "I mean hanging around with a bunch of animals getting drunk every weekend."
    "No! After I graduate, I'm gonna get drunk every night."

    The Story:

    School is about to be back in session at Faber College for the 1962 school year, and two hapless freshmen (Tom Hulce and Stephen Furst) hope to gain entry into the prestigious Omega fraternity. That doesn’t quite work out, so they’re forced to settle for Delta House, a dilapidated old shack that houses the campus goofballs and ne’er-do-wells. Perpetually on probation and at odds with both the stuffy Omegas and finicky Dean Wormer (John Vernon), the group is placed on “Double Secret Probation” for the upcoming semester. This doesn’t prevent them from engaging in a debaucherous term filled with drinking, road trips, and, of course, toga parties!

    Thursday, July 28, 2011

    Hot Dog... The Movie (1984)

    “I was mixing a drink and I hit a tree.”

    The Story: 
    Down home boy, Harkin Banks (Patrick Houser) picks up a tight-pantsed hitchhiker, Sunny (Tracy Smith), after she’s tossed out of her former ride for not blowing the driver. She’s on the way to San Fran, in no hurry, and decides to take a ride with Harkin to the skiing world championships at Squaw Valley. There, he runs into the Rat Pack, party-throwing, beer drinking misfits that are encompassed of virtually the entire tour except for the Austrian asshole, Rudi (John Patrick Reger) and his horde of brownnosers. The leader of the pack is Dan O’Callahan (David Naughton), a grizzled, drunken vet of the circuit and the man Rudi is most infatuated with destroying. After defeating prodigy Harkin by suspicious means, Dan gets fed up and challenges Rudi to a Chinese downhill race; first one to the bottom takes all. No rules. No holds barred.

    Friday, July 22, 2011

    The Van (1977)

    "There ain't a woman around who don't love the sound of a zipper comin' down...”

    The Story:

    Bobby (Stuart Goetz) has just graduated from high school and has built up a decent amount of savings from working at the local car wash. College fund? No way! A hapless geek, Bobby instead blows it all on the sweetest van in town with the singular, express purpose to get laid. The object of his affections is the super hot Sally (Connie Hoffman), but she’s dating badass douche Dugan Hicks (Steve Oliver). As he embarks on a summer of debauchery with his buddies (and his van), Bobby discovers the joys of fat chicks, Lucky Lager-fuelled partying, and, perhaps, true love with the meek but sweet Tina (Deborah White).

    Monday, July 18, 2011

    Take Me Home Tonight (2011)

    “Matthew, the summer’s over. I wanna hear your plan.”
    "I guess my plan is to keep working at Suncoast video until I figure out what I wanna do with my life." 

    The Story:

    It’s Labor Day Weekend 1988, and Matt Franklin (Topher Grace) is an MIT grad who indeed has taken a job as a clerk at Suncoast Video until his life takes some sort of direction.  One day, his high school crush, Tori (Theresa Palmer) , strolls into his store. To impress her, he claims that he’s an investment banker at Goldman Sachs; the ruse seems to work, as she invites him to an annual Labor Day bash that just happens to be hosted by the boyfriend of Matt’s twin sister (Anna Faris). With his buddy Barry (Dan Fogler) in tow, Matt prepares to finally let loose and have the night of his life.

    Wednesday, July 13, 2011

    Beach Party (1963)

    "Nothin' is greater than the sand, surf n' salt air,
    Unrack our boards just as soon as we get there!
    Stack 'em in the sand while they're breaking just right,
    Yeah, we're surfin' all day and we're swingin' all night!
    Vacation is here! Beach Party tonight!"

    The Story: 

    Frankie's (Frankie Avalon) got it all planned out: even his prudish brunette sweetheart Dolores (Annette Funicello) can't say no when he's got her all to himself after some fun in the sun at a romantic beach house. A foolproof plan, indeed... until he carries her across the threshold into their little hideaway and trips on a pile of tired, partied-out teenage guys. A step ahead of him once again, Dolores has invited all their friends to the beach for some surf, sun and maybe a little s-e-x for everyone except poor Frankie. A playful jealousy arises between the two lovebirds and they begin using their attractions for other guys and gals against the other, with Frankie falling for the horny, Hungarian hostess, Ava (Eva Six) and Dolores taking a shine to the much older Professor Sutwell (Robert Cummings). Sutwell is an anthropologist studying developmental biology, in lame man's terms, he's basically studying the mating rites of sixties California girls and boys. Will Frankie and Dee-Dee go their separate ways or will Frankie finally say those three big words that every girl weeps to hear and every guy weeps to say?

    Friday, July 8, 2011

    Up in Smoke (1978)

    "You wanna get high, man?”
    “Does Howdy Doody have wooden balls, man?”

    The Story:

    Anthony (Tommy Chong) and Pedro (Cheech Marin) are a couple of guys in search of the simple pleasures in life: good tunes, hot women, and prime weed. After Pedro picks up a hitch-hiking Anthony in his “Love Machine,” the boys embark on a series of smoked-out misadventures. Their exploits eventually land them south of the border and afoul of the cops, who end up chasing the duo after they unwittingly commandeer a van made entirely of marijuana.

    Monday, July 4, 2011

    Zapped! (1982)

    “First comes the women…then the whiskey!”

    The Story:

    Barney Springboro (Scott Baio) is a geeky high school kid who holes himself up in the science lab on a daily basis. A freak accident results in him gaining telekinetic powers, which he begins to use for his own personal gain. Along with his buddy Peyton (Willie Aames), he combats bullies and tries to score with girls, all while learning to harness his strange gift.

    Friday, July 1, 2011

    Honorary Graduate - Edward 'Peewee' Morris

    Character Profile - Edward 'Peewee' Morris

  • APPEARED IN: Porky's (1982), Porky's II: The Next Day (1983), Porky's Revenge (1985)
  • ACTOR: Dan Monahan
  • QUOTE: "I tore her up. She's ruined!"
  • ARCH NEMESIS: The ruler in his nightstand, his virginity.
  • INTERESTS: Peeping in the girls' shower, loose women, Swedish chicks, wet dreams, running train, streaking, hitting up Porky's, religiously maintaining a penis growth chart, pranks, library porn, basketball, Shakespeare... sort of.
  • DISTINGUISHABLE TRAITS: Often in a state of arousal, easily hoodwinked, goofball, brunt of most jokes, sensitive. They don't call him 'Peewee' for nothing.
  • Wednesday, June 29, 2011

    Bikini Summer (1991)

    “But it’s to help raise money to save the beach!”
    "By exploiting the attributes of women’s bodies for the lustful cravings of chauvinistic male morons? In other words, we think it’s a great idea! Where do we sign?!"

    The Story: 

    An elderly couple hires a rowdy group of young adults to renovate their home over the summer while they are away visiting Greenland. Naturally, little work gets done since the house is right on the beach where there is nothing but sand, sunsets, and girls, girls, girls. Each supposed renovator has their own goals to attain in the summer; whether it involves posing as a photographer and perving chicks like Chet (David Millbern), designing bikinis like Renee (Kelli Konop), getting drunk and doing nothing like Mad Dog (Kent Lipham) or protesting, well, everything like that annoying hippie guy. Seeing opportunity for everyone arise, Chet organizes a bikini contest to showcase Renee’s work and raise money for charity in hopes of saving the beach from a skeevy developer to cap off a Bikini Summer for the ages!

    Friday, June 24, 2011

    Bad Teacher (2011)

    "When I first started teaching, I thought I was doing it for all the right reasons: shorter hours, summers off, no accountability…"

    The Story:

    Another school year is coming to a close at John Adams Middle School, and Elizabeth Halsey (Cameron Diaz) is about to marry her wealthy fiancĂ©, which will allow her to leave the teaching profession forever. Her scheme is pretty transparent, though, and she gets dumped by the fiancĂ© (and his mom), which forces her to go crawling back to her 7th grade classroom. With the assistance of heavy drinking and drug use, she has to find a way to dodge her duties, all while trying to scrounge up $10,000 to pay for a new boob job that’ll hopefully impress the new (and wealthy) substitute teacher (Justin Timberlake).

    There Goes My Baby (1994)

    "I realized our time of growing up together was over…”

    The Story:

    Class valedictorian Mary Beth (Lucy Deakins) narrates the story of the “last days of paradise” in 1964, when she and her friends graduated high school and were thrust into the tumultuous world of adulthood. As everyone’s favorite local dive (Pop’s) prepares to shut down and local DJ legend “The Beard” howls on AM airwaves for the last time, the large group of friends deal with their own personal issues as the Vietnam conflict and racial tensions begin to spiral out of control.

    Tuesday, June 21, 2011

    Ferris Bueller's Day Off (1986)

    "Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it."

    The Story:

    Ferris Bueller (Matthew Broderick) has already missed eight days of school this year, so what’s one more? He feigns an illness that easily deceives his parents (but not his sister), so he’s left home to his own devices. He soon ropes in his finicky friend Cameron (Alan Ruck) and organizes the high school equivalent of a jailbreak to free his girlfriend (Mia Sara). The trio then bomb around Chicago, all the while eluding and frustrating the school’s dean of students, Ed Rooney (Jeffrey Jones).

    Thursday, June 16, 2011

    The Hangover (2009)

    “Remember, what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. Except for herpes. That shit'll come back with you.”

    The Story:

    Doug (Justin Bartha) and his wedding party hit the road for a last minute Vegas stag party just two days before he is to tie the knot. He and two close buds are accompanied by his soon to be brother in law/self professed ‘one man wolfpack’, Alan (Zach Galifianakis) to have an evening they’ll never forget… if they could only remember. After waking up to a demolished $4000 a day villa, they realize their wild night out might have went a little too far. With the groom missing and wedding hour inching nearer by the second, the four bros struggle to cobble together the events of the previous night by retracing the most inebriated night of their lives through the bars, casinos, strip clubs and wedding chapels of Sin City to find their lost friend, get to the altar and make it out in one piece.

    Monday, June 13, 2011

    Hollywood High (1976)

    "If I blow grass, I’ll be riding more than your board. How’re you hanging?"

    The Story: 

    While fuelling up at Big Dick’s garage, four fun-loving sluts (I’m not just saying that to be crass) help out a broke silent film legend, June East (Marla Winters), who has a penchant for outliving her numerous late husbands. Turns out these whores are aspiring actresses (no kiddin’?) and they inquire about some lessons from the old pro. Still horny after all these years, June informs the girls she wouldn’t be interested in coaching actresses… unless they can bring her some young studs to snack on. Tired of banging in bowling alleys, vans and pup tents, the girls haul their apprehensive boyfriends to June’s old mansion, only to be shocked to find out what happens in June’s bedroom is anything but silent!

    Wednesday, June 8, 2011

    Fast Times at Ridgemont High (1982)

    “First of all Rat, you never let on how much you like a girl. ‘Oh, Debbie. Hi.’ Two, you always call the shots. ‘Kiss me. You won't regret it.’ Now three, act like wherever you are, that's the place to be. ‘Isn't this great?’ Four, when ordering food, you find out what she wants, then order for the both of you. It's a classy move. ‘Now, the lady will have the linguini and white clam sauce, and a Coke with no ice.’ And five, now this is the most important, Rat. When it comes down to making out, whenever possible, put on side one of Led Zeppelin IV."

    The Story:

    Summer is over, and it’s time for students to re-enroll at Ridgemont High. As the year progresses, they endure the usual trials and tribulations a school year brings: crabby teachers, crappy jobs, relationship drama—basically, the stuff that youth is made of. Along the way, they grow up—some more quickly than others—as they seek their various pursuits. Some seek money, others look for sex, while some pursue love; and then there are some who are just content to chill out and party.

    American Graffiti (1973)

    "Get your bugaloos out, baby! The Wolfman is everywhere."

    The Story:

    It’s another summer night back in ‘62, and the streets of Modesta, California are bustling with teenage idleness. However, this isn’t just any ordinary night--it's the end of the summer, and many of our protagonists find themselves at a crossroads. Lifelong friends Curt (Richard Dreyfuss) and Steve (Ron Howard) have pledged to go off to college together, while Terry “Toad” Fields (Charles Martin Smith) still has one more year of school to go. Then there’s town legend John Milner (Paul Le Mat), who still hangs around town in his hot rod, despite having graduated a few years back. Some are trying to move on, while some are desperately holding on…either way, they’re about to have one of the most unforgettable nights of their lives.

    Senior Trip (1995)

    "Hey, Reg, man, give me a beer! Getting’ cottonmouth. Reg? Oh, man. Boy, you guys man, you sure don’t know how to party, man. Boy, when I was your age. We partied, man. Well, talk about party, might as well get one goin'!  "

    The Story:

    The road to Saturday detention Is a short one for well-liked goofball Dags (Jeremy Renner) and his best buddy, the drug-addled Reggie (Rob Moore). Multiple charges could be placed against the two right from the get-go, including driving under the influence, destruction of property, leaving the scene of an accident... well you get the idea. After "saving" an assembly from a holy rolling music group's anti-drug spiel, Dags eventually pushes too far and is caught red handed hosting a party at the principal's (Matt Frewer) house during school hours. Paying the piper, Dags and his class are forced to write a letter to congress as punishment due to their belief that the education system sucks. Only the smart girl, Lisa (Fiona Loewi) actually goes through with it and lo and behold, it catches the president's attention, they're invited to speak to congress and it's off to Washington with the biggest group of F-students, drug addicts, sluts and hopeless nerds ever to grace the seats of a bus!

    Hot Tub Time Machine (2010)

    “If I wanted to kill myself, I'd fucking kill myself. I'd be awesome at it. A shotgun to the dick.”

    The Story:

    After crashing into his garage in a drunken stupor, Lou (Rob Cordry), AKA "the violator" attempts to commit suicide by mashing his gas pedal to the bass drum beat of Motley Crue's hair classic, Home Sweet Home and inhaling the fumes between slugs of vodka. He awakens in the hospital where all his buddies have gathered to inform him they're taking him on a trip to Kodiak Valley, their old ski spot where they got mucho ass back in the eighties. Ready to rock, Lou pulls out his catheter and checks himself out. His boys, Adam (John Cusack) and Nick (Craig Robinson) are also struggling in their personal lives. Along with nerdy Jacob (Clarke Duke), Adam's nephew, they arrive at a now-dumpy K-Vals to awkwardly rekindle their dying friendships and get loaded. While drinking in the hot tub, an illegal can of Russian energy drink is spilled in the circuits and sends them back in time (with a little help from a mythical Chevy Chase!) to 1986... and Poison live in the snow!

    Tuesday, May 24, 2011

    Honorary Graduate - Freddy Shoop

    Character Profile - Freddy Shoop

  • APPEARED IN: Summer School (1987)
  • ACTOR: Mark Harmon
  • QUOTE: "I'm not a real teacher!"
  • OCCUPATION: Gym teacher / Remedial English summer school teacher.
  • INTERESTS: Not teaching, blondes, his dog, summer vacation, letting students grade themselves, gaudy sunglasses, rock n' roll, junk food.
  • DISTINGUISHABLE TRAITS: Terrific sense of humor, cool, wholesomely irresponsible, may be a "quitter", good heart.

    The greatest teacher of all-time, Freddy Shoop is the kind of laid back instructor that every cool kid wants to have for his whole high school tenure, let alone a single semester. Our own Brett G. can also attest he's the kind of teacher all teachers wish they could be, even if they're afraid to admit it. He's a personable guy, not too uptight and doesn't mind a few hell-raisers in class, in fact, he often encourages it. After another teacher wins the lottery, Shoop is forced to teach a bunch of goof-offs English over the summer he had planned to go to Hawaii with his hot little blonde. Over the course of the film, Shoop matures as a professional while staying true to himself, relating to and guiding the oddest of students. B.A.L.L.S. Academy salutes Freddy Shoop for being one of the most admirable and wittiest characters in teen comedy history.

    Back to Honorary Graduates

  • Thursday, May 19, 2011

    Rebel Without a Cause (1955)

    “Nobody talks to children."
    "No, they just tell them." 

    The Story:

    Jim Stark (James Dean) is the new kid in town, and he takes little time in endearing himself to the local police force when he’s arrested for public drunkenness. Such outbursts are nothing new for Jim, who has been branded a wild child by his flustered parents (Jim Backus and Ann Doran). Hoping to turn the page on his troubled past, Jim enrolls in the local high school, where he befriends outcast and fellow troubled-teen Plato (Sal Mineo). A girl named Judy (Natalie Wood) also catches his eye, which only draws the ire of her boyfriend, Buzz Gunderson (Corey Allen), a school bully who is quick to establish his territory.

    Monday, March 28, 2011

    Superbad (2007)

    "You could always subscribe to a site like 'Perfect Ten'. I mean that could be anything, it could be a bowling site. "
    "Yeah, but it doesn't actually show dick going in, which is a huge concern . "

    The Story: 

    Long time friends, the outspoken Seth (Jonah Hill) and even-keeled Evan (Michael Cera) are mere weeks away from high school graduation. Practically joined at the hip, the two will be going to different schools in the fall and have grandiose plans of losing their virginity and gaining experience so they don't "suck dick at fuckin' pussy" when they hit the post secondary scene. Adding to their troubles is the fact that they don't want to stick just any girl; they want to get with the primary objects of their affections, Becca (Martha MacIsaac) and Jules (Emma Stone). At the zero hour, the boys get their break when Seth brags to Jules that his friend/whipping post, Fogell (Christopher Mintz-Plasse) is getting a fake I.D. and can provide booze for her party. Things are looking just magic until the skin and bones Fogell whips out his new identity... 25 year-old McLovin. From Hawaii.